Monday:
Why don’t you commission an artist to paint a recreation of your favorite painting in the Louvre or from whatever museum you haunt? I’ve long been enchanted by David With the Head of Goliath by Guido Reni, painted in 1606. I love David’s nonchalant pose, the dark tonal quality of the image, and the memories I have of the image from my frequent visits to the Louvre. I’m sincerely considering ordering a recreation to hang in my living room as the focal piece of art that will help influence the design of the room. It’s going to be gorgeous. [UPDATE: I ordered a print. It’ll be here next week. I’m so excited!]

Tuesday:
Why don’t you play ambient sounds as you fall asleep? I rarely have sleep issues and I could sleep all day if I had the chance. Still something has occurred to me that I should have stumbled upon ages ago. Like for real, this is no new idea, I’m just late to the game. I get my best sleep on vacations. I love my bed at home but I adore being in a hotel in a foreign country listening to the city through double glazed window panes. Turns out that’s an actual sound I can demand Alexa to play. It’s wild. Sounds like I’m on the 12th floor of the Drake, or peering out on Sunset at the Chateau Marmont, or, and I’m serious, having dinner at the Olive Garden terrace in Mexico City overlooking the Paseo de la Reforma. This is wild. If only I could add donkey hooves and then it’d sound like midnight in Luxor!

Wednesday:
Why don’t you actually start sleeping the recommended number of hours a night? I never knew how beneficial this was, reader, and as I believe I’m a reasonably intelligent man, I take umbrage with the fact that my self-assured belief that I didn’t need much sleep was a farce. I’ve mentioned before that aside from student teaching, I’m basically done with college. Now, instead of staying up until one or two in the morning to feverishly work on something, I start yawning about ten and head to bed shortly after. I’ve done this for a few days…and y’all…I am actually feeling healthier and happier and I can’t get over it. My back feels better. Why did nobody tell me earlier?

Thursday:
Why don’t you gut a room in your house and redo it? I am always in a state of upgrade, I guess, and now that the kitchen is almost done, I’m thinking of my next project. I’m going to do my living room and I’ve started to collect pieces. I’ve commissioned art, I’ve bought rugs, I’ve selected furniture, I’m bidding on antique brass bowls from Cairo, and I’ve finally figured out what to do with a tricky wall. I’m giddy. It’s going to look amazing. When I finish student teaching, I’m dedicating myself to this in the hope that I can get it done by Christmas!

Friday:
Why don’t you read a book every week? I have actual mountains of books around my house and god only knows how many digital books I have on my laptop. I’d be scared to know. I’m doing my best to start reading everything, though I’m fully aware I’ll never finish them all before I die. I’m reading one Agatha Christie book every week on my Kindle and then trying to read another physical book, too. So far I haven’t been too overwhelmed and it’s been wonderful to actually have a stack of finished books starting to pile up!