Why Don’t You #18



Why don’t you take a design risk and wallpaper a room? I’m thinking of wallpapering the upper parts of my parlor with this gorgeous Art Deco paper I found online. After I pay off my bills though, of course. Or not. YOLO.


Why don’t you print off all the recipes you’ve been saving online and put them into a binder? I have no idea the number of ideas I have saved, so I may be missing out on something delicious. Flipping through a printed version, though, might inspire you to peruse them more often.


Why don’t you take up journaling? In this modern era, it no longer needs to be written down in a bound diary (but, why not? A handwritten journal will be much more evocative and charming for your grandchildren to find — but only write them in cursive, please!), but it could also be a document on your computer or even online! Like Oscar Wilde said, “I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.”


Why don’t you change your name to something more interesting? Benjamin is so démodé. I’d much rather be a Nicholas or a Dominic or even an Oliver, oh yes I’d like to be an Oliver. People in the the music world do it all the time — Beyoncé is suddenly Yoncé, which I’m still not used to, but I’m warming to it. Call yourself anything you like.


Why don’t you refurbish your fireplace or buy a new electric one at the Home Depot? There’s nothing more melancholy than a living space without a fire. I know that they’re inefficient, but they’re so charming! I will definitely be getting one or two soon. My parlor is due for a serious remodel.


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