“Oh! When will my husband come back from war?”

Monday:

Why don’t you forget about your responsibilities after work or school or whatever and go on a really, really, really long walk? Summer is over and autumn is quickly eating away at our warmth and daylight, so get out while you can. Walking is great fun.

Tuesday:

Why don’t you do some culinary experimentation and develop your own salad dressing? Your dinner guests will rave over it and you can start bottling it up and selling it on roller skates…wait, that’s just the plot of an I Love Lucy episode. Still, having your own salad dressing will be fantastic.

Wednesday:

Why don’t you buy one of those alternative keyboards that allegedly make you type faster? I’ve never done this and I don’t really intend to, but what could it hurt? I bet you can download one for your phone. Maybe I’ll do that.

Thursday:

Why don’t you rummage around your house and sell a bunch of your junk on eBay? It might not make you all that much, but you’ll get rid of it and have enough to treat yourself to dinner. Maybe without drinks.

Friday:

Why don’t you work on befriending somebody who’s friends with somebody who’s friends with somebody who’s friends with somebody who can get you an invitation to a Chanel fashion show during Paris Fashion Week? We can all watch from afar, of course. Or, if you’re anything like me — and I hope you are — you can stalk the Grand Palais in the pouring down rain like a fashion creep waiting for Karl to emerge. Still, it’s better to be in attendance.