THINGS I LOVED/HATED THIS WEEK #208

Am I wasting my life by not pursuing archaeology whilst I’m at my physical peak? I dunno. Probably never will. We never get a chance to do life over again, which I hate. I’d love to live forever and do everything I’ve ever wanted. But I can’t. And my life is roughly a third finished and time goes so much faster than I realized. This is a melancholy way to say that I watched the most stunning documentary on National Geographic about Mayan archaeology.

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THINGS I LOVED/HATED THIS WEEK #202

I’m sure that you’ve seen one of those infomercials about miraculous copper cookware that nothing at all sticks to. And if not, I have little doubt that you’ve probably started a small avalanche in a store when you walk by an aisle filled to bursting with copper skillets. These things are absolutely everywhere. I was sick to death of seeing them. I couldn’t stand to watch that woman in the commercial slide another ugly omelette onto a hideous plate. I couldn’t stand the black and white footage of a distraught gentleman crying when trying to unstick some slab of meat from a stainless steel skillet.

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THINGS I LOVED/HATED THIS WEEK #200

It came to me in a dream, a gastronomic fever dream. In my mind, whilst dying of what could have been the most severe headache in human history, I saw toasted corn tortillas stuffed with curried egg salad. Upon awakening and rejoining the living, my stomach lurched, and my legs propelled me into the kitchen. After downing about four liters of espresso, I began concocting my divinely inspired culinary creation.

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THINGS I LOVED/HATED THIS WEEK #197

We went to Planet Fitness and one of the employees took us on a tour. She showed us all the exercise equipment which we politely nodded at, but she quickly became disgusted with us after she asked what our fitness goals were. “To be tan,” I replied, quite seriously. She scoffed somewhat but controlled her rage and gave us the tour of the massage chairs, tanning beds, and body vibrator things. This looked delightful so we signed up at once.

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