WHY DON’T YOU? #248
Monday: Why don’t you get yourself an absurdly big table to use for folding laundry? The themes of my life last year were: adhesives and excavation. I learned how to […]
Monday: Why don’t you get yourself an absurdly big table to use for folding laundry? The themes of my life last year were: adhesives and excavation. I learned how to […]
I entered what I can only describe as an old abandoned asylum. There were no people there. There were no sounds aside from the humming of the lights. There was an overwhelming foreboding of something gone wrong. I simply assumed that I had entered from the back and would soon find the rest of the caucus. I was wrong and I realized this is why people always die in horror movies. It is so easy to make a dumb mistake.
New Year’s Eve is the only holiday that feels truly worth going all out for. I love the specificity of midnight, I relish the idea of reflecting on the good memories and preparing for better ones to come, and I thrive on the suggestion of reinvention. Each new year, though it truly means nothing, is an opportunity to try something new, learn, broaden, and seek. We don’t have to make resolutions, and I’m particularly opposed to resolutions, but we always have an opportunity to cheekily say, “New year, new me.”
The gift shop was absolutely lame, which might have been the biggest let down of the day. Now that I think back on it, I’m not sure what I wanted? A pencil sharpener disguised as a tiny skull crusher? An impaling pyramid Christmas bauble? I suppose it’s for the best, though a good book would have been nice to keep on hand for research purposes.
LOVE: Echo Wall Clock: I have become obsessed with smart devices as you may remember from my insane post about smart lights from IKEA. I’m madly and absolutely in love […]
LOVE:Dark Chocolate Reese’s Thins: Growing up, I thought peanut butter was fairly gross. I liked it spread on a cracker, but that was literally it. I remember two things very […]
Monday: Why don’t you decide to respect criticism only from those you respect? Everything else is just noise. I’m not digging deep into this because it wouldn’t be appropriate. Needless […]
LOVE: Evaporative Cooler: While Iowa can be beautiful, especially in the late summer when the light makes everything glow with the most stunning golden hue, it can also be straight […]
Ever since finding that deal, I’ve had my eyes peeled — what a horrifying expression, I need to look that up. Bear with…bear with…well that was a wild ride. According to linguists, the expression first appeared in American English around 1850 and was derived from a latin word that meant “to pillage.” Over the years, the original spelling became bastardized to “peel” and it meant to remove, which it still kind of does. So, the expression means to remove any covering from the eye, not to literally peel your eye away, which would seem to defeat the purpose. Anyway, back to the main point.
I miss getting into playful Egyptological arguments with scholars over martinis at The Royal Bar. I even miss the touts demanding baksheesh and donkey drivers hollering at me. I miss the filth in the streets and the flies that buzz around the horses. I miss the robes and the heat and the ferry across the Nile. I miss the cacophony of sounds at night when you’d hear honking horns and bellowing camels and the call to prayer. It suited me and I need to get back. Once I get this terrible year behind me, I’m going to treat myself to a glorious return to the sands of Egypt.