The gift shop was absolutely lame, which might have been the biggest let down of the day. Now that I think back on it, I’m not sure what I wanted? A pencil sharpener disguised as a tiny skull crusher? An impaling pyramid Christmas bauble? I suppose it’s for the best, though a good book would have been nice to keep on hand for research purposes.
When we watch Eurovision, we don’t want a ballad, we want dwarves on unicycles, hard metal Vikings, explosions, sequins, fire! The more insane the better, and I am thrilled because this year finally amped up the insanity. Let’s watch some of my favorites, first off a vampire youth from the Ukraine!
“You have a, how do you say? The head of a killer!” a woman chuckled at me at the little bookstore where tickets to the museum are sold. I grimaced warily at this odd greeting and entered the museum.
Immediately, I was gobsmacked. The first room is dark, has a terrifying bust of a Neanderthal, and opens up onto the first main room. Skulls and death masks are everywhere. There isn’t a visible surface that isn’t dedicated to the weird and horrible.
“It turns out that many places in Italy are closed on Mondays or have very limited hours. As a person who is genuinely quite lazy, I found this a charming practice. But as a gloomy man looking for a few hours of meditative peace, I found it irksome in the extreme.”