I’ve never been over it, so when I found this note addressed to a young woman that was certainly not me, I felt like it could have been addressed to me. “I wish you the best in life,” Barbara told a woman named Caitlin but it might as well have been me. It could not have been a coincidence. It was simply too fortuitous. And as Lady M told me one evening on the rooftop in Giza, there is no such thing as a coincidence. Coincidences aren’t real. And I would never have learned that life changing affirmation or valuable lesson from Lady M if it hadn’t been for Barbara Mertz. I finally went to Egypt in 2014 because of Barbara and it changed my life for the better. I feel so immensely blessed.
You can leisurely fill in your choices whilst sipping on a good gin martini while wearing a silky bathrobe and letting your expensive facial moisturizers sink in. Absentee ballots have made voting the simplest thing in the absolute world. I can’t believe that we live in a nation where such a thing is possible but so few people actually use their vote. It’s absurd really. Election Day should obviously be a national holiday so that everybody can go to the polls, but when we all have the miraculous mail, we can just vote from bed. And isn’t that what we all truly want?
Cairo was not one of my favorite places. I can’t even pretend that it was. I found the place chaotic and fascinating, but when I was there for a week, I failed to develop any irrational passion for the city. Luxor and Paris and Turin and Mexico City and Los Angeles, well, those were all different. I immediately loved them, oftentimes for no reason, often for the way they made me feel. Cairo made me feel vulnerable and foolish at first. I didn’t understand the city, and I can’t claim that I do now.
I don’t have a complaint in the world. I love the new keyboard and the gold and the GOLD and the gorgeous screen and the gold and the loud speakers and everything and the gold. I’m so happy and so pleased with myself. I love a bargain. I was going to buy one regardless, so I’m feeling truly blessed.
There is something so tragic about eating with plastic cutlery in a take out bowl. Am I being too ridiculous? I don’t think so. So, I can recommend you getting this food to take out and then plating at home on some more fashionable pieces of tableware with nice millennial gold forks. That’ll be fine. And when you’re at home you can imagine that the waitor at Tucci is back with the block of Parmesan and life is decadent and nothing is bad.
When we watch Eurovision, we don’t want a ballad, we want dwarves on unicycles, hard metal Vikings, explosions, sequins, fire! The more insane the better, and I am thrilled because this year finally amped up the insanity. Let’s watch some of my favorites, first off a vampire youth from the Ukraine!
Monday: Why don’t you run for a mile just to see if you can? I’m profoundly opposed to running. I don’t think you need to run unless there’s a cake […]
LOVE: Frozen French Onion Soup at ALDI: Okay, so I’m the queen of ALDI, which is something you already know. I seem to talk about my favorite grocery store once […]
This turned out to be yet another divine concoction thanks to that wonderful grocery store. Honestly, reader, who would I be without ALDI? Where would I be with ALDI? I don’t want to think of it.
Monday: Why don’t you buy a mantle piece at a junk shop and put a dozen delicious candles beneath it and pretend you have a fireplace? Of all the things […]