LOVE:

New Laptop Battery:

I have had my MacBook Pro for so long that I can’t even remember buying it. The only memory I clearly have is that it was a refurbished model and I was saving a few hundred dollars. The battery lasted ages, but as the years have gone by, its ability to hold a charge was decaying. I couldn’t even trust it to go to my classes with me because it wouldn’t hold a charge over half an hour. I was almost ready to buy a new computer so that I would have something more reliable, but I was headed to Mexico City and I didn’t want to spend the money or the time involved. Instead, I went to the Apple Store and inquired about having the battery replaced. This was easily accomplished and I had my laptop returned to me a few days later. I was ecstatic because the battery now lasted so much longer than it had before! The only downside was something was messed up with the trackpad, so it has stopped working properly, so I shut it off completely and use a mouse with it now. That works just fine, and a mouse is really so much more easier to maneuver than a trackpad. So, reader, I was over the moon and very smug and very happy that my beloved laptop had substantial battery life again. It was a game changer whilst I was away in Mexico because I didn’t have to worry about the computer dying before I could move it to a different room. Truly, I was in the future and living the life. Things happened later that proved this to be a wasted $200, lol, but that is for the next entry in this week’s post. I’m still so happy, though, that I had the battery replaced. If you worry about yours, get yourself to the Apple Store. One of the kindly people will nod thoughtfully at you, have you sign something on an iPhone, and then you’re good to go. God bless. 

LOLzzzz New Macbook:

So, remember last week how I said that I have little to no impulse control? Well, funny story, I’m typing this week’s post on my brand new golden MacBook! I had an email alert that woot.com was having a big sale on MacBooks, and I hadn’t had an email from them since I was in high school, so curiosity got the better of me and I opened it. Long story short, I made a funny squeaking noise and whipped out the good old Discover card. Bless it. It’s been through so much. Anyway, they were selling refurbished MacBooks for almost half price. I am a ho for a good refurbished bargain. My last two laptops have been refurbished and they’ve treated me too well, so I had no qualms about buying it in this condition. I had like a little concern when I thought about my credit card bill, but reader I’ll assure you, aside from my portable dishwasher, this is probably the greatest thing I’ve ever treated myself to. I know that I just upgraded the battery in my old laptop…but it’s not gold, you know? I now have the entire gold line of Apple products, which I’m both ashamed of and deeply proud of. My phone’s not anymore, but they didn’t make it in gold, and I really considered getting something else, but that gorgeous iPhone X seduced me in the end. That has nothing to do with anything, though. Sorry. The MacBook arrived a few days later and the two of us have been inseparable ever since. The weekend it arrive my house mysteriously and hilariously was without Internet service. Turns out a rodent ate through the cord where it attaches to the house. That can’t have been a good meal. Anyway, once I had Internet, I shoved all my data from my old computer onto this gorgeous little thing and I don’t have a complaint in the world. I love the new keyboard and the gold and the GOLD and the gorgeous screen and the gold and the loud speakers and everything and the gold. I’m so happy and so pleased with myself. I love a bargain. I was going to buy one regardless, so I’m feeling truly blessed. 

Dual Diffuser:

For the longest time, I have been really irked by fragrances. I don’t like any perfumed detergent in my laundry and I don’t want my house to smell like anything. I bought an air purifier that I absolutely adore and it made my house smell so much fresher. But then my friend and I went splurging at Bath & Body Works and now I can’t be without one of their decadent fragrances. My favorite is Bergamot Waters and if they ever stop making it, I’ll have to cut somebody. My other favorite is a dreamy thing called Happiness that seems to be in the process of being retired, and if that really happens, well I’m just not responsible for what I might do. I love the candles, and I use them all the time, but I have a candle confession. I’m slightly terrified of them. Think how many candles are floating somewhere in my house after I’ve burned them. I don’t mean like ghost candles, I mean like, what happens to all that wax? Now I feel stupid so I’m going to look up what happens in a candle. Bear with… 

…Well that was absolutely fascinating. Turns out the heat from the flame melts the wax — obvi, I know — and then the wax travels up the wick where it is vaporized into a gas which is unstable so it easily breaks apart into boring molecules that make up the stuff we normally breathe. So there isn’t a graveyard of melted candles haunting me. Kind of a relief. Anyway, that wasn’t the point of my post. Bath & Body Works also sells these gorgeous little diffusers that you plug into the wall and enjoy the fragrance without the fear of passing out with a candle blazing and waking up surrounded by flames. Maybe that’s just me. Anyway, when I was last there shopping for things I certainly didn’t need, I saw a new device that allows you to plug two different fragrances in and then it ALTERNATES AUTOMATICALLY EVERY TWO DAYS. Reader. This is groundbreaking technology. For two days my bedroom smells of Bergamot Waters and then two days later it smells like Mahogany Teakwood. This is madness. I’m obsessed. It comes wrapped in this gorgeous faux leather, matches my decor, and has a fabulously subtle little nightlight but in. It’s so luxurious. Make one yours today. 

Brita Pitcher:

I’m really not that particular with my water. Either I love it or it’s nasty or whatever. It’s usually whatever. I was once obsessed with Tŷ Nant water from Wales, which I could only find at gourmet grocery stores when I was in high school, but then I found a case at Marshall’s and it lost it’s allure. So now I just drink water out of the tap. It’s fine. It’s quite good, actually. But nothing compares to Parisian tap water. Why that isn’t bottled and sold around the world is a mystery to me. And I’m a ho for a good bottle of Fiji water. Never will I ever turn that down even in this time of global warming armageddon. But then the other day at work somebody was getting rid of their Brita filter and I needed filtered water for my espresso machine so I decided to live a better life. I grabbed a filter at Walmart and enthusiastically filled the pitcher. And honestly, reader, that water simply cannot be the same water that came out of my tap because it is freaking delicious. Like the water tastes so good that it’s silky in my mouth. Like it’s candy but it’s just water. I always thought that these things were nonsense and totally unnecessary, but I can already tell that I’m spoiled by it. Oh my god, am I going to be one of those people that travels with a water filter? How chic! I’m not sure if I’m just overly enthused about it because it’s new or if it’s honestly remarkable, but I’ve had so much water today. My kidneys are flushed, my skin is hydrated, I feel vibrant and alive. Like would it be wrong to get a filter for my bathtub so that I can bathe in filtered water? I think that’d be reasonable honestly. Does such a device exist? That’s not important right now, what’s important is that I go fill the pitcher back up because I just drained it down my throat. Live your best filtered lives, reader. 

HATE:

Road Construction EVERYWHERE:

Allegedly this madness is nearly finished, but I can hardly get to work. The main highway that I use to get to and from y job has been closed ever since I returned from Mexico. This has been endlessly annoying. Supposedly it’s going to be finished soon, but we all know how road repairs go, they never ever end on time. I have been taking my daily walks down to the construction sites so that I get a chance to monitor the progress and glare at the blacktop. It looks close to being done, but I have yet to see anybody actually doing anything. Literally I have never seen another human being on the road. There’s just a bunch of abandoned equipment and piles of gravel. Yes, I have been tempted to hot-wire some of the vehicles and dig a pool at my house. I think that would be justified because of the inconveniences I have endured. I have had to take a gravel road through another town to get to another road that will connect me to work, and because there are so many people using it right now, the road is barely there. It’s literally five miles of mud. It has been raining almost nonstop for the past week, so the road is barely navigable. When I had to go to a training a few weeks ago, I literally went into the ditch because the road was nothing but MUD. It was horrible. I somehow managed to get the car back on the road, but it was absolutely filthy and something started dangling off the bottom. Turns out it was something called a vent filter and it only took ten dollars to repair, but STILL. I have less fear driving in a blizzard than I do on a gravel road in the rain now. AND THEN IT GOT WORSE. Yesterday on my way to work even the road to the other road was out of commission. For whatever reason, in their great wisdom, the construction crews — whoever they are — decided to work on the road I use to get to the highway at the same time the other highway was shut down. I had take a detour around it and then find another path and I barely got to work on time. If you know me, you know that I’m already chronically barely anywhere on time. It’s a genetic flaw, I’m sure. This is allegedly only a minor repair though and it should be fine by Monday morning. But I am so sick and tired of my car being covered in mud. I feel poor.