Monday: Why don’t you buy property in some obscure town and then create a new identity and live there during the summers and visit on holidays? Anybody with an Internet […]
Monday: Why don’t you try alternative medicine for whatever ails you in the chance that it might work? I mentioned before that I’m having some absolutely awful shoulder pain, and […]
Monday: Why don’t you follow me and one of my favorite Hollywood fashion trends and wear gorgeous pajamas as everyday wear? My fashion pajamas are not designer, reader, my gorgeous […]
Monday: Why don’t you realize that you were born at exactly the right time and nothing in the past was as glamorous as it appears? Last night, for reasons I’m […]
There is something so tragic about eating with plastic cutlery in a take out bowl. Am I being too ridiculous? I don’t think so. So, I can recommend you getting this food to take out and then plating at home on some more fashionable pieces of tableware with nice millennial gold forks. That’ll be fine. And when you’re at home you can imagine that the waitor at Tucci is back with the block of Parmesan and life is decadent and nothing is bad.
The best part of learning is that it’s never over, you know, and when you start looking into one thing, you discover an entire world that should have been in your face the entire time.
I sat in the courtyard with my churros, a bottle of tequila, and a bag of cat treats. Patron and Little Chiffon were laying beside me and then the church bell tolled midnight. I took a shot of that deliciously cheap tequila and petted the kittens and then all of a sudden I was 28.
Monday: Why don’t you water all of your houseplants with coffee you didn’t finish? I’m not the world’s greatest horticulturist, but I have plants in almost every room of my […]
Monday: Why don’t you start each day with a mimosa? If I didn’t work in public education, I’d take my own advice. I had the past week off, so I […]
The real triumph, though, was a box of chocolate by a brand called Merci. Reader…oh my dear and darling readers. These little bars of chocolate are extraordinary. Truly, they taste like they came out of a fine chocolate shop in the middle of a little village in Switzerland. I can’t believe I can pick them up at a budget grocery store in the middle of the state in the middle of the country. We live in truly blessed times. The box that I picked up had several flavors, but the one stuffed with dark chocolate mousse was the best. I cackled merrily as I sat in bed eating chocolates and watching the Kardashians. I was getting fatter, getting nothing done, and doing no good for my workload, but I was living the definition of my very best life.