Monday:

Why don’t you design and plant a formal English garden in your yard? It doesn’t matter how big or small your creation is; it only matters that it looks better than your neighbor’s yard. Invite them over for mint tea and gloat over your superiority.

Tuesday:

Why don’t you spend an afternoon sketching with charcoal and colored pencils? This is a lost art form. Back in the Victorian times everybody had a decent artistic hand and would sketch their travels in their travel diaries. Nowadays, only the artsy people draw; the majority of the rest of the population takes crappy pictures on their cellphones. The modern world is so wonderful, but it can be rather barren, you know?

Wednesday:

Why don’t you make a list of all that ails you and then take it to a healthcare professional? Being well is very important, but for some reason many of us are reluctant to share what is making us unwell. This is silly. I do it too.

Thursday:

Why don’t you give away all of your assorted flatware and random spoons and nonsense and invest in a nice new set or two? I think every home should have one formal/elegant setting and another for everyday usage. I have Royal Doulton china for my elegant tea parties, some fine china from Williams-Sonoma for when I’m feeling casually elegant, and some gorgeous blue IKEA dishes for everyday meals. I’d pair the casually elegant and IKEA dinnerware with some sleek forks and spoons. The Royal Doulton would be an antique solid silver set — I’ve only got a few pieces of them, though. Sad.

Friday:

Why don’t you throw away all of your socks and invest in new ones? You should have plain socks for workouts and colorful socks for a good time and sartorial knee high socks for all occasions. I’m well know amongst the children I work with for my crocodile socks and my fox socks and my shark socks. Be memorable with your fashion, reader.