I could spend every moment of the rest of my life looking at fashion photography. I absolutely adore it and if it were in my power, I would be a fashion photographer — after being an internationally renowned underwear model, of course. I’d do high fashion editorials and runways, too, but my specialty would be underwear modeling. I think it would be fun. Maybe that’s just me?

Anyway, here’s some more pictures that inspired me.

I have tried to get my hair like this probably a dozen times. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, but it never works out this way. It’s too wavy, has too much texture, and way too much pouf. I’ve really been considering growing it out long again after seeing pictures of my hair in 2006. I was stunning. My hair, mind you, the rest was a mess. I was fat, acne-ridden, and my glasses that I thought were so chic, well, they weren’t. They were Armani, so at least it was a designer failure. Now that I’m older, much prettier and care more about my appearance, I think I could maintain long hair with style and class. If not, I’ll just whack it off.

Three things I love, no four actually: mirrors, sweaters, the desert, and v-necks. I love a good v-neck. I don’t care what anybody says about men wearing deep cut v-necks, I won’t stop and you can’t make me. It’s pure style.

I would never wear those horrible watches or those glasses or have my hair flat-ironed like this, but I would rock this shirt like no other. After watching L’Amour Fou, the Yves Saint-Laurent documentary, I have been obsessed with Mondrian-inspired couture like this. Topman used to make a t-shirt similar to this one, but it was discontinued years and years ago. I can’t find one on eBay anywhere. This is like the tragedy of the pink Versace suit that I can’t find anywhere. If anybody in the future needs to get me the perfect gift, that’s it.

PLEASE BUY IT FOR ME! FIND IT FOR ME! MAKE IT MINE!

I haven’t ever worn a cardigan with a blazer, but I’m totally going to start now. Look for a new profile picture like…tomorrow.

I don’t think jean shorts are acceptable, but these work. Getting some.

I love everything about this. I want that anchor tattoo. I want that tie. I want those arms. I need that bag. I was just at the Ralph Lauren shop in Chicago, but didn’t see it. Need for my summer vacation. Let’s see if I can find it…bear with…bear with…couldn’t find it, but I found this:

BUY IT FOR ME! FIND IT FOR ME! MAKE IT MINE!

Serving chartreuse realness! My favorite color! Have you ever worn chartreuse, I recommend it. I’ve never tried drinking chartreuse, though, which I feel I should do. It was originally made by Franciscan monks in France and is a gorgeous chartreuse color. Get it?

I don’t wear anything like this because I don’t own anything like this and have never seen anything like this for sale, but I would wear this shirt every damn day.

Why doesn’t my hair do this?

I dress in this exact ensemble regularly.

This outfit is everything. Every single aspect of it is perfection. Cut off his head and put mine on it, please.

Hair…join me…get on my head. How do these models do it? I need to go to hairstyling classes or something.

I want to dress like this and go on a raft and sail down the Mississippi and stop in all the river towns and have a picnic and buy a crumbling brick house and own all these clothes. Where do I get that shirt? I’m lusting over it. I have a slightly similar one in black, but it’s lighter and not nearly this nice. I NEED IT. And those shoes! And I have actually made my hair do this!

Again, I’ve dressed exactly like this. Shoes, pants, and shirt! He could be my twin.

I own all these pieces and am going to wear this ensemble the next time I go out. Well no, I’ve got a different outfit planned for my next excursion, but this is going on my outfit queue. Stop scoffing. Don’t you have one? No wonder you look like shit every day.

Ermahgerd, samesies! This ensemble is timeless.

Dear sir,

Give me everything you have on your body. You can keep the awful bag.

Love, Ben.

Another hairstyle I can’t do! Must do! Must sing songs with this hair! Must wear more bow ties!