I can’t stop saving pictures, so it’s time for another delightful installment of my faux Tumblr. Prepare yourself for fun.

I have become obsessed with Jean Cocteau’s art again. It was so simple and yet so distinctive. I hate myself that when I stayed at the Hôtel Welcome in Villefranche-sur-mer, I wasn’t as appreciative of his pieces on display there. He used to stay in that hotel and even painted a chapel in the village that is now a French national treasure. I was more interested in the beach, my balcony, the cemetery, and the rubble pit that used to be the Hôtel-ker-Maria, though, so I didn’t think to go. Next time, I’ll fix my error.

Me.

I need this shirt more than I need anything else in this world.

My cats are all desperate for this collar. They’re really hip cats.

Who are they? Where is this tiger? Can we all be best friends? PLEASE?!?!?!?

Inspiration for wallpaper. Wouldn’t this be a stunning dining room? Not outside, of course, but the same idea.

This is the saddest, yet most elegant toilet I’ve ever seen.

Kittens and tequila!

I used to make fun of this quote, but I really get it right now.

I cannot wait to be an old person and act like this all the time.

I wish this were real.

Made me laugh.

I need this in my life. I want to drink pink champagne and wear a suit and sit in there late into the night while old records play. Ahh…I was not meant for these days. My time was the early 20th Century.

We have…like…so much in common. Hair and a love of beds.

I’m Fat Amy in my mind.

I’ve been wanting this sweater for ages! He found it at a thrift shop. #totesjelly

TOM DALEY INTERLUDE:

Help! I’m drowning!

Get dressed, Tom!

Ok.

This looks like me, so I saved it. I think that phrase is supposed to be inspirational or something.

Next year’s Valentine #1.

Next year’s Valentine #2.

Next year’s Valentine #3.

Speaking of Tyra, let’s talk about the injustice of me not being on America’s Next Top Model. Here’s how my friends reacted:

Paris and Nicole were shocked.

Ru was flabbergasted.

Hillary told me, “Gurl, get over it, you’re better than reality television.”

Karl wanted to give me a hug.

Once she could speak, Ru sent me some encouraging words while I was feeling down.

André and Ms. J were like, “Join the club.”

Tom was this close to sobbing.

Grumpy Cat was no help at all.

Le sigh…