I Met David Sedaris, or, “I shit in your mother’s mouth!”
Today was awesome and I think I found my calling. More on that later. It’s probably a false alarm anyway. I’ve made that bold declaration a hundred times before. I […]
Category Archives: Twitter
Things I Loved/Hated This Week #13
LOVE: Good Off: This stuff is miraculous. It smells dreadful and makes my lungs feel like they’re shutting down, but it will take paint off of anything in two seconds. […]
I’m Gonna Be On Top
On Tuesday night, for the first time in my life, I finally felt completely alive–I was filled with jubilant energy, I was radiant with happiness, and I was terribly nervous. […]
That One Time “America’s Next Top Model” Retweeted Me
Yeah. That happened. You know what this means. Only a matter of time until I win. Here’s my audition tape again:
